I quit weed and I’ve felt a lot more disconnected from people I thought were my closest friends for years. Suddenly it feels like we have nothing to do together when we hang out, or I don’t want to spend time with them while they are smoking. It really stings.
I get that it’s probably for the better, but it sucks. Thankfully I have a really supportive girlfriend who cares about me, but I was wondering if losing close friends after quitting weed is normal? Did you experience this?Anonymous
Hi Anon! I didn’t necessarily “lose” friends, but I did have to “cut some friends loose”. And yes, this is normal.
By that I mean, there are some friends I had where the friendship was centered around getting smoking weed: “Wanna get high and play some video games?”, “Wanna blaze up and watch a movie later?”.
It was almost a ritual: They would come over, we would weigh up our loot, would roll a couple of joints, we would smoke, we would do X thing until we started coming down, then we would smoke again. And it was the same thing every time – because it was not about friendship – it was about getting high.
Of course, when I quit, I had to say “no” to “getting high and doing X”. And I couldn’t tolerate being around high people whilst I was in my early days of sobriety – so I had to “cut them out”, for some time.
I still love and care for all the people I was friends with back then. But my life went in a different direction. That said, I still am friends with a number of these people now by reconnecting down the line. Luckily for me, many of them also quit/cut down on weed and are willing to for example go to the cinema to watch the new Marvel movie with me without the need to smoke up beforehand.
Plus, being able to focus on my hobbies outside pot I made a lot of new friends where the friendship was never based around what was a soulless drug addiction – and I’m a lot better of for it!